Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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