And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I'm like, not good at living.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
