My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
