is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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