thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
