I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
