There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
