Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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