then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Randomize
