Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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