So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I have demons in me.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
