dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
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