New invention idea: vibrating tampons
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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