I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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