I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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