did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
