ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize