S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
