i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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