Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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