I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
did you just send me my own nude
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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