So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I just want to make out with him forever
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
