I'm going to jail i love you
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
