TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Can I color on your dick again?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
