Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
