the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
