dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
