Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
