Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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