If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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