Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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