we should wear snuggies to the strip club
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
