please come you make the beer taste better
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
