You're so nebulous sometimes
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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