bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
