I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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