what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
