My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
