i just had sex bonerless
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Randomize
