Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
