I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
