i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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