McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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