Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Operation Purity has been aborted
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
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