We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
