I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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