this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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