So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
