it was like eating out sand paper
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
