I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Randomize