David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
